regular feature of my columns in the Journal was my mention of my "weight loss journey" - which in fairness on enough occasions ended up more of a weight gain journey.
I've done it all - every plan under the sun. Bootcamps, Biggest Losers, Yoga (that is SO not as easy or as relaxing as it looks). My biggest success was in 2015 - when I managed to shed a whopping big 4 stone.
Which is a lot.
But since January, when life took me on an unexpected journey, the loss has not continued. And in fact I have back peddled a little.
Now I need to re-peddle - and get focused on getting healthy again.
And it's more important than ever because I know losing weight and keeping weight off will help me manage my Fibromyalgia better. It won't cure it. But it will make me overall stronger so hopefully I don't cave under the pressure of it.
But God, I hate this bit. The starting again. I hate the wait for the scales, I hate the weight on the scales. I hate the "one last bun" temptation.
I hate that until my body gets used to not being a gorby gorb I *will* be hungry. Despite all the free foods in the world - none of them are carb filled sugary baked goods - I will be hungry.
It's not an easy process. It's not just a matter of "eating less and moving more" - because emotions and life and patterns of behaviour get in the way. Sh*t happens, as they say.
If it didn't, none of us would have weight to lose in the first place.
But oh it's so nice to start this time with such a relatively small weight loss to go to reach my target.
Then again I'm also starting knowing that I am unable to exercise to any real level. And while on meds which make me UBER hungry (Think Cookie Monster).
I think this time I will need more support than ever. Are you with me? Will you hide buns from me? Will you say lovely things about Watermelon? When I weep from chocolate withdrawal will you show me pictures of Michael Buble's wife to encourage me on?
I'll help you, if you help me!
*And for the record, it's Slimming World which I rely on as my current diet of choice. Other weightless programmes are available - but no others have Rocky Road Hifi Bars. So that's me sold.